It's about a week and a half until school. I should be out with my friends, with some ending summer party or at least able to walk the quarter mile to Taylor's to stay a night. No. I get to baby sit. Or I get to stay home because Shauna just "feels like it". She's retarded. She feels the need to assert dominance over me every day of my life because she has some stupid syndrome or something. She should go suck a fat one.
So summer has been less than savory. Yes, it has included the best times of my life in it. Virginia and I in Kelso being the best, I'd have to say. The two days we spent with my best friends was amazing. I love those guys, and I love that girl. It was practically perfect.
At the same time, each day at home progressively got worse. Do you know any teenager that had to wake up at 10 every day or be punished for it? In his own house? And the punishment would last at very least a week, once it was two weekends because I babysit every other day. I couldn't go anywhere for two weeks because I slept in. Yeah, that's just one of the bullshit rules here.
I don't have anyone or anywhere to be my safehouse, either. Not consistently. They would never let me go anywhere at a constant rate. Never. I can't be in a production in drama at school because I wouldn't be able to get to rehearsal. I can't do any extracurricular activities because they won't drive me. And I go to a very active school. It's bullshit. A lot of bullshit happens here.
And nothing I say gets through to them. No matter what I do, it's always my fault. I react to something in a way they don't like and they'll steal everything away from me. I want to scream at them, tell them they're being sadistic morons. Make them see through the cloud of ignorance they've created through the years we've lived here. They don't listen. They don't think ahead of themselves. What are the other kids going to turn into in this environment? I have been practically conditioned through it, but the other kids will have serious mental scars. They'll grow up ignorant and just as full of hate.
School is my refuge. But it's temporary. I can't live there like I would like to. My friends help me through the times when my guard falls and I fall into a slump, but I shouldn't have to depend on them. I can, but I don't want that to become a constant.
I think I'm done here for now. Next post is on the ignorance of religion and specifically hatred towards gays. Not kidding.
Bai.
At the same time, each day at home progressively got worse. Do you know any teenager that had to wake up at 10 every day or be punished for it? In his own house? And the punishment would last at very least a week, once it was two weekends because I babysit every other day. I couldn't go anywhere for two weeks because I slept in. Yeah, that's just one of the bullshit rules here.
I don't have anyone or anywhere to be my safehouse, either. Not consistently. They would never let me go anywhere at a constant rate. Never. I can't be in a production in drama at school because I wouldn't be able to get to rehearsal. I can't do any extracurricular activities because they won't drive me. And I go to a very active school. It's bullshit. A lot of bullshit happens here.
And nothing I say gets through to them. No matter what I do, it's always my fault. I react to something in a way they don't like and they'll steal everything away from me. I want to scream at them, tell them they're being sadistic morons. Make them see through the cloud of ignorance they've created through the years we've lived here. They don't listen. They don't think ahead of themselves. What are the other kids going to turn into in this environment? I have been practically conditioned through it, but the other kids will have serious mental scars. They'll grow up ignorant and just as full of hate.
School is my refuge. But it's temporary. I can't live there like I would like to. My friends help me through the times when my guard falls and I fall into a slump, but I shouldn't have to depend on them. I can, but I don't want that to become a constant.
I think I'm done here for now. Next post is on the ignorance of religion and specifically hatred towards gays. Not kidding.
Bai.
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